“My child has had a lot of regression since his hospitalization. Can you speak to why that might be?” A nervous parent once asked me.
“Absolutely.” I confidently say. I am a child life specialist after all.
Internally a voice of doubt starts to scream: “No way, you don't actually know! Open your mouth and this family will quickly tell that you are a child life imposter.”
Imposter syndrome is an interesting phenomenon that I continue to encounter in myself and even in others who I deeply admire and respect. Are we all just walking around feeling like we don’t measure up the way that we should? Does anyone have a true confidence about being “the real deal”?
The term “imposter syndrome” was coined by a clinical psychologist in 1978…turns out I am not the only person who feels this way! Psychology Today defines imposter syndrome as “a psychological term referring to a pattern of behavior where people doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent, often internalized fear of being exposed as a fraud.”
The imposter syndrome has had a loud voice in my life as a mom and professional. Here are just a few of the many examples:
The imposter syndrome can stem from a variety of causes (pride, self-centeredness, craving validation of others to speak towards my worth).
No matter if an intervention with a patient was a smashing “success” or if our coping plan went out the window, I can still fall into speaking the imposter syndrome voice to myself.
No matter if my work was validated by special recognition or if it has been weeks since anyone even said “thank you,” I notice the internal dialogue to be one and the same: “you aren’t enough. You don’t do enough. Do you really even know what it is you are supposed to be doing!?”
When I can catch myself falling into this imposter syndrome during good times and bad, I am slowly learning how disciplining my mind and training my thoughts is crucial to my own self-care and practice as a CCLS. It is worth the fight.
Four Ways to Fight Imposter Syndrome:
1. Voice your fears and imposter feelings.
Literally say them out loud to yourself. Tell a trusted friend about these feelings. Then, refute them. Even if your heart isn’t fully in it, speak the truth about who you are. You have to introduce a new voice that can counter the imposter syndrome swirling in your head.
2. See how far you have already come.
Remember that you were hired for a reason! Your organization saw you as a qualified candidate that could contribute to their team. Remember all the studying you did. Remember the fears you already conquered.
3. Identify areas of pride, unhealthy comparison or people pleasing tendencies.
So much of imposter syndrome stems from self-centeredness. We are stuck in our own heads worrying about what people think of ME. Fight for a selfless attitude and you won’t feel like such an imposter.
4. Acknowledge your actual weaknesses, and consider who might compliment your insufficiency.
No one can do everything perfectly. No one is sufficient alone. So, let’s challenge ourselves to stop thinking only about ourselves for a minute, and consider the real ways that we need help. There is likely someone on your team that could support you where you are weak. Embrace this and imposter syndrome will lose some of its power.